I'm Rising Up To This Fear

​I recently wrote on the fact that I need more fear. Well, in reality, it's the fact that I need to face more fear. This past year has been a series of one adjustment after another - I left some people, met some people, but I also made some big decisions. Within this process, I've become a bit numb to change. Now, I'm caught in a place where I need to push myself again.

​The obvious first step of facing fear is to identify it. I've been doing a lot of thinking, and I think I know which fear I'm going to tackle first: loneliness. Maybe some people can't tell, but I've been feeling very isolated. It's heavy on my mind lately, and going out of my way to either meet people or speak to people I've lost contact with is terrifying to me. Although, it's necessary.

Now that this information has been shared, I'm making it my quest to meet more people. All the while, I'm forcing myself to be a better friend to the ones I already have. I have to be honest: yes, friendships have always been hard for me - but they have to go both ways. If I'm not doing my part, then I don't have the right to complain. I'm rising up to face this fear because life without companionship just isn't for me. I'm going to do whatever I have to do to solve this for good.